Tara - I loved every word of this newsletter! So many friends have every excuse in the book why they can’t travel when I try to organize a trip (some legit, others not so much). It was so frustrating to me (and, frankly, a bit hurtful) until I said, screw it. I’ll just go! There’s nothing more liberating than traveling alone. No compromises to be made and you can set your own schedule, meals, sleeps, etc. Now, having said all that, I am thinking a women-only Lillies trip would be a super fun adventure! I have experience in travel planning so let me know if that’s something in the cards. I’d gladly help you organize. Think of all the fun we’d have! 🌸🌍🌸
Omg! I LOVE this!!!! I'm definitely trying to come up with an in person retreat, but I never thought of Lilies trips...that's a fantastic idea, thank you!
1. Tara, you look AMAZING in that first picture in Portugal. GLOWING like the Glow Getter you are.
2. I LOVE solo travel. I have been blessed to do so much of it and while I love traveling with friends or a significant other, traveling alone will always be important to me. I always highlight for people who are worried some of my favorite benefits: I get to choose every. single. thing. I do. I get to eat at the restaurant of my choice. I get to go on the excursion I want to go on. I wake up and go to sleep when I want to. If I like a place I'm in, I stay longer. If it's not what I thought, I leave and find something else.
And I often do something I wouldn't normally do with someone else... befriend a stranger, try a new type of activity, stay in a hostel and eat dinner with someone from another country. I love it. AND Tara, I'm usually willing (and almost always able) to go on the drop of dime, SO if you want to go somewhere AND want a buddy, hit me up and maybe we can travel together (not creepy at all... I've also traveled with near-strangers many times and it's *almost* always worked out splendidly. I actually am pretty convinced we have enough in common that we'd have a blast).
Thanks for shining your light into the world for us!
Danna! Love all of this. And I should have mentioned the "you get to pick EVERYTHING" aspect. So thanks for bringing it up! And I feel like our paths will cross - perhaps over a croissant in Paris? xoxo
Oh my, Tara. Sometimes I feel like there truly is divine intervention. I've been journaling around my fear of being alone, which came out of Glow p. 233 "Catching a glimpse of my essential self." I'm in a very loving relationship, but I feel like it could be better (or I could be better) if I wasn't afraid of that. I thought maybe I should travel alone somewhere and see what happens? And then, boom, here you are with this newsletter haha
I am..ahem..probably older then most of you——but am setting off to begin traveling alone, for a variety of reasons. I am a nervous human being so…can work myself up into worrying about solo traveling in a heartbeat. Any ideas on taming that tendency? AND THE PACKING THING! How do you fit everything into one carryon roller suitcase?
There are all kinds of ages here :) I think you'd be surprised with the spread!
1) Set up conditions to be as safe as possible and make you comfortable - agree not to go into dark places at night alone, hotels with concierges, tour guides, etc. List it out on paper In other words: BE safe
2) Remind yourself when nervous that nothing bad has happened, you're just rightfully protective of yourself. But mostly orient yourself to the present, not an imagined fearful future
Tara, I love this newsletter so much! Thanks for sharing all your tips.
I wanted to share some information for the extroverted lilies, because as much as I’ve tried to do solo trips where I’m on my own… I found my energy getting super zapped. As the only single person in my groups of friends, it’s definitely been harder in my 30s to find ways to travel to places I want to go without getting my energy completely tanked (see comment above: I am an extrovert’s extrovert who needs to deeply engage with people daily or else I am going to fall asleep at a bus station bench in Oahu! Yes that actually happened to me when I attempted my last solo trip!).
Enter: Group travel. It’s signing up to travel with a group of people who you don’t know. Last year I went to a women’s surf camp in Costa Rica (Surf Bikini, you changed my life!) and it opened my eyes to the ability to travel alone, while being with others. I had plenty of alone time to do a lot of the things you mentioned, Tara, but then each morning and evening I’d have dinner with beautiful people who loved sharing their souls with me. My energy never waned, and I was able to experience a place I’ve always wanted to go while growing and making new friends.
I recognize that something like this might seem like a nightmare for introverts, or be cost-prohibitive. Totally get that! But wanted to pass along since solo travel can really exhaust the hard-core extroverts like me.
Some amazing companies you can take a look at: Culture Trip, El Camino, Club Adventures, Explorer Chick, Flashpack, and there are truly tons of surf / yoga retreats like the one I mentioned above.
And I am very up for a Lilies trip or retreat! I’ll be the one bringing people together over shared values — my superpower 💪
Wow I could have done with this a couple of months ago on my first (semi) solo trip. I say semi because I was there to be a maid of honour, though I suppose in some way attending a wedding alone is kind of the ultimate solo experience... ANYWAY, while I still have a long way to go with feeling totally comfortable in my own company, I definitely agree it's so nice being able to do whatever YOU want to do, at your own pace, no compromising. Perhaps more than that though, it's a chance to learn more about yourself - your likes, interests and dislikes. Now I think about it, I almost feel odd saying 'travelling alone' because you're not alone, you're with yourself - the most important company you'll ever have!
I wish I hadn't lost this but my fav singer - Feist - once said something like..."no matter who comes in and out of your life, you have to be good with you. You die with you." And its morbid, but it's essential. YOU are a lot, you are not alone - ever, and the faster we can all learn that - the easier life is. Thanks for reminding us all.
I've been travelling the world solo for more than 30 years, and I wouldn't have it any other way. I completely transform once I clear customs, leaving my socially isolated, misanthropic self back home. I've learned far more from all of my travels than I ever did in five years of university. And it makes you fearless. If you can navigate border crossings and public transit in Third World countries, job interviews and first dates pale in comparison. I'm always asked if I feel safe travelling alone as a woman, and I find that treating people with respect makes all the difference in the world. And realistically, if shit's going to go down, it's going to go down here at home. I live in Vegas, where 60 people were randomly gunned down at a concert. Aside from active war zones, I already live in the most dangerous country in the world. So do I fear for my safety while exploring Egypt? Not in the slightest. Learn a few phrases in the local language, smile at little kids and tip generously. The entire world is open to you.
And I second any suggestions for ways that fellow Glow Getters could connect for travel adventures.
@Angela, this is such a good point. Before I went to Buenos Aires, I was told, "don't bring anything valuable." So I left ALL my jewelry at home. And guess what? I was robbed in LA while I was in BA. So I agree- you really never know. That said, I try to be super responsible (no dark alleys late at night - etc) but it's not like LA is the top safe city in the world :)
Discovering the joy/comfort/security of bringing a journal with me when dining solo was such a game changer for me years ago. Before that I had had business trips where I literally skipped dinners, or just grabbed snack food to eat in the hotel... I am not sure my social anxieties have diminished, but my understanding of them and toolbox of tricks to function around them have grown so much!
Thank you for the response. I am profoundly grateful for your books and all the work you have done on yourself and share so generously. It helps. So much. So thank you. You shed so much light for the rest of us. I read Hitha’s book as soon as I read her piece on your site (planning for my upcoming adventure) AND gifted it to my daughter who has since heading off to summer camp has had a lifelong battle with her suitcase contents.
Now I want to take a solo trip. The only time I traveled by myself was traveling from Arizona to Illinois to see my family. I stopped at White Sands National Park in New Mexico and at first it felt odd being there by myself, but it also felt a little empowering and invigorating. I didn’t spend much time there due to time and 10 more hours of driving that day, but I’m SO glad I stopped for that one hour.
hahahaha YES, YES, YES! That's what I do! I order it anyways! Also: sometimes another solo person will share with you. Once in Geneva a man from Saudi Arabia heard me asking the waitress about a "small" fondu and in that moment, offered to share his with me. He told me a FASCINATING story, I got some fondue, and he even paid for it. Total win!
Tara - I loved every word of this newsletter! So many friends have every excuse in the book why they can’t travel when I try to organize a trip (some legit, others not so much). It was so frustrating to me (and, frankly, a bit hurtful) until I said, screw it. I’ll just go! There’s nothing more liberating than traveling alone. No compromises to be made and you can set your own schedule, meals, sleeps, etc. Now, having said all that, I am thinking a women-only Lillies trip would be a super fun adventure! I have experience in travel planning so let me know if that’s something in the cards. I’d gladly help you organize. Think of all the fun we’d have! 🌸🌍🌸
PS, featuring your comment in this week's newsletter :)
Omg! I am SO flattered! 😍 #LilliesRetreats
Omg! I LOVE this!!!! I'm definitely trying to come up with an in person retreat, but I never thought of Lilies trips...that's a fantastic idea, thank you!
T$
1. Tara, you look AMAZING in that first picture in Portugal. GLOWING like the Glow Getter you are.
2. I LOVE solo travel. I have been blessed to do so much of it and while I love traveling with friends or a significant other, traveling alone will always be important to me. I always highlight for people who are worried some of my favorite benefits: I get to choose every. single. thing. I do. I get to eat at the restaurant of my choice. I get to go on the excursion I want to go on. I wake up and go to sleep when I want to. If I like a place I'm in, I stay longer. If it's not what I thought, I leave and find something else.
And I often do something I wouldn't normally do with someone else... befriend a stranger, try a new type of activity, stay in a hostel and eat dinner with someone from another country. I love it. AND Tara, I'm usually willing (and almost always able) to go on the drop of dime, SO if you want to go somewhere AND want a buddy, hit me up and maybe we can travel together (not creepy at all... I've also traveled with near-strangers many times and it's *almost* always worked out splendidly. I actually am pretty convinced we have enough in common that we'd have a blast).
Thanks for shining your light into the world for us!
Danna! Love all of this. And I should have mentioned the "you get to pick EVERYTHING" aspect. So thanks for bringing it up! And I feel like our paths will cross - perhaps over a croissant in Paris? xoxo
Oh my, Tara. Sometimes I feel like there truly is divine intervention. I've been journaling around my fear of being alone, which came out of Glow p. 233 "Catching a glimpse of my essential self." I'm in a very loving relationship, but I feel like it could be better (or I could be better) if I wasn't afraid of that. I thought maybe I should travel alone somewhere and see what happens? And then, boom, here you are with this newsletter haha
Fine! I'll go! Thank you! Haha
YAY! I love kismet moments like that! Thrilled you and your essential self are about to hit the road! xoxo T$
I am..ahem..probably older then most of you——but am setting off to begin traveling alone, for a variety of reasons. I am a nervous human being so…can work myself up into worrying about solo traveling in a heartbeat. Any ideas on taming that tendency? AND THE PACKING THING! How do you fit everything into one carryon roller suitcase?
There are all kinds of ages here :) I think you'd be surprised with the spread!
1) Set up conditions to be as safe as possible and make you comfortable - agree not to go into dark places at night alone, hotels with concierges, tour guides, etc. List it out on paper In other words: BE safe
2) Remind yourself when nervous that nothing bad has happened, you're just rightfully protective of yourself. But mostly orient yourself to the present, not an imagined fearful future
3) I love this book on packing by Hitha Palepu - https://hitha.substack.com/ - https://www.amazon.com/How-Pack-Travel-Smart-Trip/dp/1101905646
Tara, I love this newsletter so much! Thanks for sharing all your tips.
I wanted to share some information for the extroverted lilies, because as much as I’ve tried to do solo trips where I’m on my own… I found my energy getting super zapped. As the only single person in my groups of friends, it’s definitely been harder in my 30s to find ways to travel to places I want to go without getting my energy completely tanked (see comment above: I am an extrovert’s extrovert who needs to deeply engage with people daily or else I am going to fall asleep at a bus station bench in Oahu! Yes that actually happened to me when I attempted my last solo trip!).
Enter: Group travel. It’s signing up to travel with a group of people who you don’t know. Last year I went to a women’s surf camp in Costa Rica (Surf Bikini, you changed my life!) and it opened my eyes to the ability to travel alone, while being with others. I had plenty of alone time to do a lot of the things you mentioned, Tara, but then each morning and evening I’d have dinner with beautiful people who loved sharing their souls with me. My energy never waned, and I was able to experience a place I’ve always wanted to go while growing and making new friends.
I recognize that something like this might seem like a nightmare for introverts, or be cost-prohibitive. Totally get that! But wanted to pass along since solo travel can really exhaust the hard-core extroverts like me.
Some amazing companies you can take a look at: Culture Trip, El Camino, Club Adventures, Explorer Chick, Flashpack, and there are truly tons of surf / yoga retreats like the one I mentioned above.
And I am very up for a Lilies trip or retreat! I’ll be the one bringing people together over shared values — my superpower 💪
PS, featuring your comment in this week's newsletter :)
Love this! Yes! This is something I'm thinking of doing myself! Thanks for bringing up group trips and thanks for being here!
I love this!! I’ve never done any solo traveling or really much traveling at all but I want to!! Thank your for all your inspiration!!
My total pleasure! Let me know if you do it!
Wow I could have done with this a couple of months ago on my first (semi) solo trip. I say semi because I was there to be a maid of honour, though I suppose in some way attending a wedding alone is kind of the ultimate solo experience... ANYWAY, while I still have a long way to go with feeling totally comfortable in my own company, I definitely agree it's so nice being able to do whatever YOU want to do, at your own pace, no compromising. Perhaps more than that though, it's a chance to learn more about yourself - your likes, interests and dislikes. Now I think about it, I almost feel odd saying 'travelling alone' because you're not alone, you're with yourself - the most important company you'll ever have!
I wish I hadn't lost this but my fav singer - Feist - once said something like..."no matter who comes in and out of your life, you have to be good with you. You die with you." And its morbid, but it's essential. YOU are a lot, you are not alone - ever, and the faster we can all learn that - the easier life is. Thanks for reminding us all.
I've been travelling the world solo for more than 30 years, and I wouldn't have it any other way. I completely transform once I clear customs, leaving my socially isolated, misanthropic self back home. I've learned far more from all of my travels than I ever did in five years of university. And it makes you fearless. If you can navigate border crossings and public transit in Third World countries, job interviews and first dates pale in comparison. I'm always asked if I feel safe travelling alone as a woman, and I find that treating people with respect makes all the difference in the world. And realistically, if shit's going to go down, it's going to go down here at home. I live in Vegas, where 60 people were randomly gunned down at a concert. Aside from active war zones, I already live in the most dangerous country in the world. So do I fear for my safety while exploring Egypt? Not in the slightest. Learn a few phrases in the local language, smile at little kids and tip generously. The entire world is open to you.
And I second any suggestions for ways that fellow Glow Getters could connect for travel adventures.
@Angela, this is such a good point. Before I went to Buenos Aires, I was told, "don't bring anything valuable." So I left ALL my jewelry at home. And guess what? I was robbed in LA while I was in BA. So I agree- you really never know. That said, I try to be super responsible (no dark alleys late at night - etc) but it's not like LA is the top safe city in the world :)
Discovering the joy/comfort/security of bringing a journal with me when dining solo was such a game changer for me years ago. Before that I had had business trips where I literally skipped dinners, or just grabbed snack food to eat in the hotel... I am not sure my social anxieties have diminished, but my understanding of them and toolbox of tricks to function around them have grown so much!
I LOVE THIS! Yeah, a journal is just one tool. And with practice, I find I don't even "need" the journal. Thanks for your take!
Thank you for the response. I am profoundly grateful for your books and all the work you have done on yourself and share so generously. It helps. So much. So thank you. You shed so much light for the rest of us. I read Hitha’s book as soon as I read her piece on your site (planning for my upcoming adventure) AND gifted it to my daughter who has since heading off to summer camp has had a lifelong battle with her suitcase contents.
Now I want to take a solo trip. The only time I traveled by myself was traveling from Arizona to Illinois to see my family. I stopped at White Sands National Park in New Mexico and at first it felt odd being there by myself, but it also felt a little empowering and invigorating. I didn’t spend much time there due to time and 10 more hours of driving that day, but I’m SO glad I stopped for that one hour.
hahahaha YES, YES, YES! That's what I do! I order it anyways! Also: sometimes another solo person will share with you. Once in Geneva a man from Saudi Arabia heard me asking the waitress about a "small" fondu and in that moment, offered to share his with me. He told me a FASCINATING story, I got some fondue, and he even paid for it. Total win!
PS, putting you in this week's newsletter :)